On Love

Love is such a broad topic. I think it is the most energetic force in the universe. The opposite of love is fear. This love is a greater love than we can fully grasp. Pure love is one without judgment, without conditions, and without motive. Love encompasses respect and compassion but it is the greater element. To love someone is to truly accept them as they are. This applies to self-love as well. Truly accept yourself as you are. Offer love and acceptance and forgiveness to every part of yourself. It is necessary to do this first to a great extent before you give out love to others.

Love is also about change. Love will always offer a better way of doing something or a way of being in exchange for one that is not working. Love encourages us to the greatest arena of our imagination and life. It encourages everyone equally. It offers acceptance equally. As you open to "Love" it begins to fill your whole being. Then it begins to fill your whole sphere of influence; your friends, your family, your students, your associates, the people that you encounter. One person or creature offering out pure love begins an overflow of energy that can affect the whole world, and the whole universe. It doesn't sound possible but love is such a big force that wave after wave of love can affect great change starting with you.

Love transforms fear, which contain all the elements that vibrate at low frequencies; fear, terror, anger, hatred, rage, envy, jealousy, grief, sadness, hostility, disrespect, disgust, and alienation. Love heals. It takes away the hurt and transforms any residual that remains. Love purifies everything that it touches. But once it comes in it never leaves you nor forsakes you. It continues to purify to the highest vibration possible. It affects change because it purifies so deeply, and so completely. It is capable of touching every area of your life and others. Love does not force. Love just keeps loving. With love great joy is allowed to come in.

If you don't feel that you have love in your life, start offering love first to yourself. Offer yourself to love. Let it have every thought, every hurt, every dark, bad moment. It will receive everything that you give it without condemnation and offer great compassion.

Next allow the people that come to offer kindness, and compassion to touch you. Let them hug you. Hear their words. Let words of love come into your thoughts without rejecting them. Change any thinking that has been telling you that you are unworthy of love or kindness. Begin to receive the small shows of affection. The hugs, the smiles, the gentle touches. Children offer unconditional love. They are usually happy to offer you hugs and affection. Animals are a good source of affection and love.

Volunteering is a very good way to extend love out. Practice kindness. Imagine how past kindly loving guides would love them. How would Jesus love this person? What would he think about them? What would he say to them? How would he feel about this person or about me? How would Gandhi act in this situation? How would Mother Teresa behave towards them?

If you have not read about the lives of these great kindly beings, read everything that you can. The New Testament in the bible Specifically John is a great place to start. Gandhi The Man is very good book. As is The Celestine Prophecy series, Conversations With God series.

If you are open to it strangers may surprise you with an act of kindness and love. Very often spontaneous moments offer great warmth and love. Do not reject this. Many times we are afraid of the other and do not offer affection to someone that is hurting. One way to receive more love is to reach out to someone who is hurting. A stranger or an acquaintance could greatly use kindness and love from you. In that moment there is a great exchange of love. You have acted as an instrument of love.

Praying about love and asking how to be a more loving person can give you great comfort and insight. Examples will be shown to you. Moments will be open to you in which you can choose to give love and to receive it. The more times that you embrace those moments in a loving manner, you will begin to open to the subtlety of love. Acts of loving come in the small quiet places to the great big dramatic moments. Each time if you pray and meditate in your heart and ask how would "love" react here you will receive insight as to how you could act to express love.

It is not always easy especially when you are dealing with a person who is cranky, grouchy, unjust or nasty. You have to look beyond the criticism, beyond their unpleasantness and see that more often than not they are afraid. Perhaps that person has gotten to this moment of crankiness, and being mean or controlling because they learned that behavior. They don't know how to be nice. Or they have been hurt so many times that they have forgotten how to drop their defenses. They are stuck. You can help them by accepting them as they are. Offering love and kindness in spite of how they behave.

Love is a slow, patient energy. It does not win by attacking. It does not force. It remains consistent whether it is night or day, a good mood or a bad mood, acceptable behavior or unacceptable behavior.

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Finding More Love in Your Life

After observing the riots in the Middle East and seeing the anger of Muslims over a cartoon of Muhammed, it prompted me to write this article.

Having seen all of that hate expressed over this cartoon also reminded me that hatred is never the path to true peace and happiness.

Since religion is supposed to make us better people, I have to ask the Muslim world, how can all of that hatred make me a better person?

As a Christian, the very linch pin of my faith is the idea of love. I'm not talking about the kind of love you see in the movies. That's lust.

I'm talking about the kind of love that changes the world and makes it a better place to live. The kind of love that heals, that makes us want to be better human beings. The kind of love that would make the Good Samaritan want to stop on the side of the road and help a man he didn't know simply because the man was in need.

The Bible teaches us that God is love (1 John 4:118). Jesus said that the greatest commandments were to love God, and then love our neighbor AS ourselves (Mark 12:28-31). This means that a crucial part of loving others involves loving ourselves so that we can love others.

However, he never explained what real love was in this passage. What is real love?

1 Corinthians 13 gives us an explanation. In verses four through eight, it explains what real love is: patient and kind, without envy, arrogance or rudeness, and it seeks the truth.

These values are old fashioned. We live in a society where people do evil things and then claim they made a mistake. That they shouldn't suffer the consequences because what they did was a joke, they weren't in their right minds, or any other myriad of excuses.

We live in a world where a cartoon causes more anger, and a deeper call for justice, than the deaths of millions over religious fervor.

Yet, what, as Christians, can we do? So why is it so hard for us to love? Why should we love our enemies? Why should we love people who may, at the very core of their existence, be evil?
The lack of the ability to love comes from being hurt. From holding onto our hurts and our pain. To carrying around the burden of our sin. There are many other reasons, but these are the most obvious and basic.

The path to learning to love others comes from learning to be whole. To heal. To find freedom from our sin. To let go of the pain, grudges, and hurts of the past. By letting go of these things, we become free. This is the kind of freedom Jesus offered us, a kind of freedom that isn't available in any other religion.

Although other religions are bound by rulese, Christianity really isn't. The enduring concept of Christianity is grace. Grace is an undeserved gift, the love and favor of God. If he can love us even when we dont deserved to be loved, how can we not love others?

I believe that only free people can truly love. Although there are many reasons that I chose to become a Christian, one of the main reasons was that Christianity offered a freedom, and a peace, that no other religion offered. With that freedom and peace comes a price though: it puts us in conflict with the world and the values of the world.

Another reason that it is hard for us to love others we don't want to love is that it requires sacrifice. Sacrifice is an alien concept in our society today because it means putting the needs of others ahead of our own. It means paying a high price because we aren't gratifying our own ego.

We also requires us to give up our preconceived notions and judgements of others. It requires that we care for those who may have unjustly wronged us because of their own selfish motives. What we don't often understand is that loving others isn't about who they are; it's about who we are.

I believe that love is the most powerful force in the universe. I believe that love has the power to change the world that we live in. Love is the solution to the problems of the world.

Love is what gives us the capacity to truly change the world and make it a better place to live in. I'm sure that this sounds simplistic, but it's the only force powerful enough to cure what truly ails us as human beings.

You may say, "but I'm only one person". It doesn't matter. It only takes one person to make the world a better place. Apply the principle of love in your life, and you will watch your whole life change, your whole world change. This is how true change begins, at an individual level.

Maybe you're saying, "but what will others think of me?" When you truly love others, it really doesn't matter what they think. The question now becomes, "how can I love others more"? Again, it's the path to freedom.

If you haven't gotten everything out of your faith in Christ you thought you'd receive when you became a Christian, maybe it's time for a change. Christianity isn't a religion anyway; it's a way of life. It calls us to a different standard than that of the world, a standard that would make the world a better place if we only lived by it.

If your life isn't all it should be today, try applying more love to it. After all, love is the only true path to lasting peace and happiness.

If you want more success in business, in your relationships, and in your life, try applying love to the situation. As you change, your world will change forever. For the better.

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How To Keep His Love Forever

Love can be fleeting. That fact alone is disheartening when you meet and fall in love with a man. Finding someone that you truly adore is rare and naturally you want to do whatever you can to ensure that he'll stay in love with you. All around us it seems that so many relationships are falling by the wayside. If there's anything you can do to secure the love you two share, you want to do it, right? Learning how to keep his love forever will help you to keep the passion alive and keep him devoted solely and completely to you.

Understanding how to keep his love forever starts with recognizing the need to be spontaneous, always. There's a certain urgency that comes with having a new and exciting relationship. You want to experience everything you possibly can with that person and so you're more apt to want to do spur of the moment things. Men love women like this. They enjoy being with someone who takes the lead in the relationship and makes plans. Always try to keep this part of you alive and thriving. Surprise him as often as you can and show him that you're always ready to go on any adventure, as long as he's part of it. He'll love this because it will keep him on his toes and it keeps the relationship fresh and unpredictable.

Never lose yourself as you become more immersed in the relationship with the man you love. So many women do this and they don't fully understand how it changes the dynamic they share with their man. He fell in love with you even though you had a busy, chaotic life. Men love feeling as though they are with someone who is vibrant and dynamic. He loves hearing about everything you have going on. It makes him proud of you. Don't move your life around to accommodate any man, ever. They don't appreciate it for what it is and they don't find it appealing. Your man wants you to have the life you want and need and that includes spending time with him. He doesn't want you to give up everything in your life for him. That puts a very heavy and unwanted weight on his shoulders.

Learning how to keep his love forever has to include understanding that being yourself, always, is crucial. Don't try to impress him by pretending to be something you're not. Men see through this very quickly and it kills any attraction that was there. He wants you to embrace your flaws and shortcomings. He loves those things about you. Men find them quirky and cute. Never apologize for anything about yourself, be it a couple of extra pounds or the fact that you don't yet have the job of your dreams. If you love yourself, he'll continue to love you too.

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The Internet & Online Dating Sites - the Good and the Bad

 
 

Today's singles and most people, generally speaking, are very lucky with the online choices they have compared to 10 or 20 years ago given the options the internet now offers them. 20 years ago there were far less online options than are available now days. Mobile phones are a good example of how far the internet has progressed in recent years. Several decades ago paging services or cb radios were the fastest way to contact someone when they were not at home. Today though, mobiles are used to carry out several non related functions, the actual mobile itself is just one of many features. Mobiles can be used as a video camera, surfing the internet, gps device and online dating. That right online dating.....will technology ever slow down ? I doubt it! Today's singles can experience online dating not only from their pc and laptop but also from their mobile meaning they can organize a date 24/7 anywhere, anytime.

Another excellent advantage online dating has is the capability for singles to get right down to business and sift through the thousands member profiles until someone catches their eye. No need to feel guilty by having to tell your new internet friend your not interested, you simply move onto the next profile. Chat rooms commonly provide singles another fantastic way of communicating with other singles and still allows you an easy out if need be.

No need to spend money or even dress up to go internet dating. Some dating sites offer free online dating its just a matter of searching through the many dating sites on the internet to find them, so locating the ultimate in happiness doesn't even need to cost you one single cent. Cancel your hairdressers appointment, for the females that is, not that its not okay for the males to book in at the hairdressers although if you are a guy who's just signed up to an online dating site, admitting to booking in for a new hair do may not sit all that well with the girls you chat to online. Forget the make up and after shave, online dating gives you the chance to win over your next date with just your personality alone via the chat rooms.

Short of time? Does your job hold you back from getting out and socializing? Search for like minded singles in the chat rooms or via the member data base in a matter of minutes, fire off emails and chat invitations to those you find attractive, then simply go back to your normal daily routine. Check back online during the day or several days later and you may have a nice surprise waiting for you in your messages.

The bad.

Some singles can become too reliant on using online dating sites and can end up socially separated from real life social possibilities. For those who fall into this category should be careful that you don't lose important social skills by relying on online dating services too often. Use it but try not to abuse it. Like anything in life, participate in online dating, but in moderation.

Singles interviewed in studies conducted by Professor Parnizky from Macintosh University who claim to being addicted to online dating said that their first thought was to log on to a dating site in search of love, rather than to venture out offline to put themselves in a situation where they could possibly meet with other singles in the offline world. These same singles mainly indicated that they felt they were losing and had all but lost touch with finding a romantic partner conventionally.

A regular complaint online dating members spoke of was that when they met their online dating friend in person, certain physical features were some what different to what was stated on their member profile. Their photos were not current, or were taken in a studio or sometimes wasn't even them.

For those thinking about online dating, don't get too hung up with this dating option and use these services to your advantage but don't over do it. Treat it as some fun and don't have alot of expectations, this is the best way to approach online dating and you just never know what you may find.     

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Love and Relationships

Are you in a committed healthy romantic relationship that's very good for not only you, but equally for the person you love. Love and relationships are to become made for ever, not only a few days. Take a look into getting your life much more enjoyable and purposeful by realizing how to act when it comes to those you care most for.

The greatest thing to do in a romantic relationship is to care for the other person´s needs ahead of your own. Being selfless is the core of what love is all about. If you're having issues with selfishness you need to deal with them successfully ahead of coming into a marriage or other serious personal relationship. Why pull another individual into your issues? In the event you really desire to help them, you'll need to put them before yourself. This suggests sacrifice. Selfish individuals aren't prepared to make sacrifices for other people. If you're this way, save the individual you claim to adore the painfulness of finding out.

An additional significant factor of love and relationships will be the neglected virtue of commitment. Society tends to make it difficult for a guy and a lady to maintain the dedication of holy matrimony. Within the United states of america one is actually compelled to fork out much more taxes should you be married than should you just stay together. But what does "staying together" tell society? It tells the world you desire the pleasures and advantages of matrimony with no dedication. Again, this really is selfish. Don't forget; love isn't self-centered. Do the right thing. In case you genuinely would like to live for a partner, make an open public commitment of holy matrimony and get the advantages of a clear conscience as well.

For anyone who is seeking to become married to end your being lonely, this is a self-centered reason. Are you going into a marriage to help make yourself happier? How many individuals are doing this very thing and rendering their lives and the lives of others unpleasant during the process? Love and relationships are created to be mutually satisfying to both persons. If one side starts to have unrealistic expectations, it could be a ticking time bomb of feelings. What will happen when both parties have unrealistic expectations? This really is a formula for failure. When coming into critical personal romantic relationships, it can be very good to have wide open communication channels. You ought to discuss all the expectations you might have plus the other half must do likewise. The word "all" is emphasized in that previous sentence. Money, sex, the long term, kids and any other important topic should be brought out in to the discussion and frankly pointed out. Getting transparent and sincere may be the greatest policy in romance.

Love and relationships are to be held in high esteem when they're seen within the bonds of marriage. This partnership will be the bonding fabric of humankind. In case you mess it up, you aren't doing anybody a favour. About three of five marriages in the Usa are faltering, according to available data. Do not be a contributor of this break down of the social structure.

In case you are not one to keep your word, especially in marriage, it's best to keep out of the romantic relationship. Get your life in order. Grow to be the person that others can model their existence around. Later on, enter into a meaningful romantic relationship that makes the other person the object of importance. Be selfless and become happy.

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Why Real Love Requries Honesty

Recently, I picked up a great book, Act Like A Lady, Think Like a Man by Steve Harvey. Overall, I love the book except one part of it gave me pause and made me reflect. It was in the chapter about “Why Men Cheat” on their wives, girlfriends, etc. Harvey’s basic answers are: 1) They Can. 2) They Think They Can Get Away With It. 3) He Hasn’t Become Who He Wants and Needs to Be or Found Who He Truly Wants. 4) What’s Happening at Home Isn’t Happening Like it Used To. 5) There’s Always a Woman Out There Willing to Cheat With Him. And, ultimately he explains the man hasn’t got his priorities straight especially in having a real and meaningful spiritual practice in his life.

Ok. So far, so good. And, I also agree with what Harvey says regarding why a man is able to get away with his cheating and lying behavior with the women he is with. One reason this happens Harvey explains (using my paraphraze of what he says not his exact words now) is because any woman he is with hasn’t set high enough standards in her life to respect and love herself enough to see what is going on right in front of her and take a stand about it. She basically colludes in the notion that denial is good for you. After all, “What you don’t know won’t hurt you.” And, since her denial lets him get away with what he wants to, he is happy to join in on the denial party with her. But, denial is not good for you and it feeds one of my four major love myths I discuss in my Attracting Real Love course — love is blind. Wrong! Real love actually requires 20 - 20 vision because you only know how to really love yourself and others when you are seeing what you need to see clearly.

Which is why when I read this in Harvey’s book I decided I couldn’t disagree more. He says if a woman starts to catch on to a man’s cheating and lying behavior and starts to ask questions a man is going to just do more of his lying and denying game. Why? Harvey says men will do this “if we care about you. But, if not — if a man doesn’t see you fitting into his life plan — he won’t even bother with all of the covering up.” WHOA!!! Come on, Steve! I know the rest of your book also says that a man who really loves a woman won’t cheat, but let’s clear this up right now! Le’t not make it seem like somebody is cheating and hiding the truth from someone out of love. No way, no how!

So, why do we really lie? Plain and simple We’re afraid. Period. Why are we afraid? We don’t love ourselves or the people around us enough to live in truth. And, real love requires the truth. Not some blunt rude make people feel stupid and horrible version of truth. But, truth nonetheless! And, if you want proof of who has the most loving relationships going on between them? Well, it’s between people who can live in truth completely. They love and respect each other so much they want to be honest with them. They care about not hurting them. They care about being loved and respected in return for who they are flaws and all. And, they want a partner who can hear the truth and help bring it all into the realm of consciousness in a loving way and heal any fear in the realm of love. That means the more a couple lies to each other, the more they actually are in fear of each other, which means love really isn’t very present at all.

Now, why do we refuse to live in truth? It’s simple. We are thinking more about ourselves and coming from our egos. We simply don’t want to have to face the consequences of what we are doing and be forced to change our hurtful behaviors. We don’t want to feel bad about ourselves by having to see clearly what is really going on. Or, to share another quote, We tell lies when we are afraid… afraid of what we don’t know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie, the thing that we fear grows stronger. ~Tad Williams. In short, we are afraid to love and feed fear in our lives instead.

Ok, I don’t expect people to be perfect. But, try this on for size. Next time you catch yourself or other people telling lies ask yourself this, “What am I afraid of and how does this reflect a lack of love in myself or a lack of love regarding the people I am with?” Then, ask this, “What would it be like to love myself and others enough to be willing to take the scrape, instead of give one?”

Notice this as well. Despite what people say finding out the truth doesn’t hurt! What hurts is discovering how much there was a lack of love and how real love was replaced by deception and fear. Remember, real love heals it doesn’t hurt. And, though it may hurt to find out about lies, shedding them actually opens you up to attracting more real love in your life creating space for the rapture described in the main quote above — for yourself and the people around you.

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How to Get My Ex Back

Ex Girlfriend

Have you recently had a fight and you're now suffering because you lost your ex girlfriend? That simply means that you love her too much to let go just now, so what are you waiting for?

The question -- "How to get my ex girlfriend back" often arises in your mind and you should start looking for an answer that will guarantee your success to get your ex girlfriend back in your arms. Keep reading and I will tell you two strategies that can help you find the answer to "how to get my ex girlfriend back?".
Before we start with the two strategies, lets make few things clear in case you want to reunite with your gal - women are complex creatures, they are more emotional than us men and most of the times they are not clear about what and how they feel about a particular situation, in other words they can hardly make up their mind. Hence, trying to understand and analyze their moves would be a fatal error in case you want an answer to "how to get my ex girlfriend back?".
First Strategy.

Hide all your emotions and don't let her see that you're suffering. She will soon become curios to know why you being so calm and "not interested in her anymore". Give her a week or so -- don't let too much time to pass or you might end up losing her forever. Take your time to think about what went wrong in your relationship, you might as well go on a short vacation. She will soon find out that you're moving on with your life and become even more curios to know why you're acting this way. Trust me she will want to get back with you...
Second Strategy.

Approach her directly, be honest and clear while communicating your feelings. Look in her eyes whenever you talk to her. Your passion and love should be oozing out from your body language and words - and trust me it will work. Women are emotional, they forget and forgive. Learning how to get your ex girlfriend back isn't that easy and if you noticed the two strategies are opposite one to another, however they both work. There are several get ex back guides that will not only teach you basic information but step-by-step proven psychological tricks to get your love back in no time, all you need is to find a solid guide that contains the right information you need.

Ex Boyfriend

You would be surprised when one fine day your boyfriend would turn to you and say that he needs more space. I am sure that you would be more than surprised as per you the relationship would have been going fine with all guns blazing, this would be like a speed breaker for you.

There could be so many reasons that your boyfriend would end up saying these words and feeling this way. You never know, if you can handle this situation right and the next thing you will be thinking of will be - "how to get my ex boyfriend back" and you should find all the possible ways to do so if you are still in love with him.

There could be many ways to deal with the problem. Try to find some reasons of why he needs more space; or sneaking in like a detective to know if he has some other women in his life; he might not find you or the relationship as interesting as it used to be. Many people including your friends and family members can help you out after a breakup. Listen to what others have to say before you pursue to fix the problem and get your ex boyfriend back.

The best thing to do is what he is asking you to do. He has asked you to give him some space, and that's what you should do for a week or two. The more you would want to get into the details or why's and but's, the more helpless it is. Try to figure out why he needs space in the first place and why is that he doesn't want you anymore. (last but not least try to figure out if the relationship is worth saving) Let him think about what went wrong in your relationship, and he might soon come back to you, however you will definitely need patience.

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Friends with Benefits

Many people can only imagine having friends with benefits. How to define friends with benefits you could possibly ask? Well, friends with benefits are basically friends in which you are free to have unattached, guilt-free sex with. While for some people this may sound immoral or not right but to those who have relationships such as these will tell you that man and woman have needs that has to be filled. As long as these needs are filled with no love is made then being a friend with benefits is known as successful.

The ground rules for having friends with benefits is pretty simple, pinpoint the sex. That's it, pinpoint the sex and nothing else. Without inhibitions, the sex from these types of relationships usually are much better than most because of the lack of expectations from all parties. The best part with this is the fact one party cannot accuse another of simply using the other for purposes of sex, because that's the actual foundation the relationship to start with. Sex without any of the headaches of a normal romantic relationships could be pretty fun if you just keep to the ground rule of working on the sex and not developing any romantic attachment towards the other.

The concept of obtaining friends with benefits is also one of convenience. By convenience, I mean that if anytime you're feeling the impulse to accomplish the nasty, you won't have to get your game on by going to a bar or possibly a nightclub and experience the hassle of picking women up. All you have to do is give your friend a call, and when my hunch is proper, she might indulge you as long as you return the favor when she comes calling at three a.m. needing a quick fix.

The principle downside to this is when one party suddenly becomes territorial. One party easily forgets the boundaries within the relationship and starts to want something a lot more than being friends with benefits. A common situation is in the event the other party starts seeing someone on a much more serious level and the friend starts getting jealous feelings or fears of being left alone. Many a friendship has been destroyed by one party becoming too attached to the other. If you're the type that gets territorial, it's best to avoid getting friends with benefits from the get go.

Yet another thing to keep in mind if you choose to obtain a friend with benefits is the fact that to keep the relationship as secret as you possibly can. Even if the "Benefits" part are over and you choose to remain just friends and you enter into a significant relationship with another woman, your new partner will never trust you with your friend ever again. Women keep it within their mind if it has happened once before, it may and it will happen again even if you don't plan it.

Obviously, there are instances where being friends with benefits has graduated into something more serious which relationships are actually quite strong due to the trust as well as the friendship which has developed well before the romance part.

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